Je suis en colere!

Je suis en colere. Non, je suis terriblement en colere!. And for good reasons.

I came back to this country two years ago with high hopes that I could do my insignificant share, pardon the trite phrase, of building and turning this country into a nation that we all could be proud of.

I receive the pittance from this government with out complaining or grumbling. After all, I have considered government service a voluntary job, and if anyone wishes to receive buckets of money in salary, he or she should work for the private sector.

I don't hesitate to do fieldworks in areas deemed dangerous. I have been to remote places teeming with malaria and dengue mosquitoes. I have braved both typhoons and scorching sun and arrogant municipal mayors and baranggay captains- all in the name of public service.

Having dutifully done my responsibilities, I expect our leaders to do their end of the bargain.

Instead however of working for the welfare of our country, those vultures in high places are busy wrestling power from their political opponents. When this pathetic political wrangling will ever end?

Two months ago, four of my colleagues died a tragic death in line of duty. Their dedication to their work embodies the highest ideals of public service. Their examples ought to be emulated by everyone, including me.

Events however from the last few days allowed me to pause and think.

Will I be willing to die for this wretched country, given the kind of leaders that we have?

You bet.